in need

This few days have been going for CE talks or walking around window shopping.

Today went orchard with huishan.

Met shiting by coincidence and we keep laughing due to the "middle finger joke".

Dunno is it i suay or what shoes halfway spoil while walking =.=" and having stomachache at the same time.

Huishan wanted to go to robinsons to look for her friend jasper and maybe see if they are any job vacancies available.

We went to every floor except the fifth floor because she said the fifth floor was like the least likely place jasper will be under that department but who knows when she reach home,she told me jasper was there at the FIFTH FLOOR LOL.

Today i made a new discovery!

Ion`s toilet is really like NICE.

Got apple scent some more.

HAHAHA sua gu i know.

I don`t mind living there.*kidding*

Ok i guess that is all.

Goodnight ^_^!!!

I guess it is not i don`t feel pain.

It is not that i am too stubborn to cry.

It is that the pain is suppressed for too long that even i don`t know how to release it.

I wonder how long i can take it?

I don`t understand, i really don`t, this feeling being suppressed so deep within the soul.

I may be smiling now but let me tell you today my mood was damm bad.

Even though it may be a joke.

But i cannot stand it anymore.

Please don`t associate me with some unknown person which i have never even know or spoken to.

It is annoying.

I BUCKING dislike it man.

I don`t like these false scandals/rumours going around.

Want associate also associate with someone i know or am closer to right?-.-".

Other people might think that i am flirt or something but i am not.

Don`t test my patience.

"They say love is blind."

"I say it only see what matters." - Quoted by a tv commercial.

I am sure my face is gonna get slimmer and slimmer i swear (._.)/o.
Recently i watched a Hongkong drama.
Hahas back to the HK drama days.
HK dramas are nice ok.
Even better than those taiwan ones.
I used to like those "idol dramas" lah,but then too unrealistic and the story plot like always the same so now when i see those dramas i will be like "arghh can totally predict the endings ._.".
This drama that i am watching now is called "The ghost writer" or in chinese 蒲松齡.
Even though i have the tendancy to watch like part by part and now the full show.
I find this show nicer than the raymond lam and tavia yeung the "Kingsley" one.
These two are the SCV most recent drama.
This show haven`t reached the ending yet but i heard a rumour about the ending and it is a very unexpected and sort of twisted one.
First an introduction to the drama...
PO CHUNG-LING (Steven Ma) was born in Jinan a family of New Year print.
He is very bright, his father, PO POON (Yueh Hua), has therefore always hoped that he could one day carry on the family business.
LING, mistakenly thinks that POON is working in collusion with some corrupt officials, refuses to listen to what his father says.
His good friend, KO JIT (Chan Kam Hung), is a constable and he hates corrupt officials as much as LING does.
Rumor has it that a fox spirit is creating troubles in Jinan.
LING is almost killed when he is investigating into the matter with JIT.
Fortunately, a mysterious girl named LING WU SIU-TSUI (Fala Chen) comes to his rescue in the nick of time.
It turns out later that she is the fox spirit, and that she saves LING so as to return a past favor. As they spend more and more time together, TSUI starts to fall for LING.
The PO family has secured a large order of New Year print.
To ensure the work can be finished in time they have to hire a large numbers of female workers. LAU SUM-YU (Linda Chung woots ^_^ sorry ger =x) applies for the job, but her real intention is to look for the man who was unfaithful to her sister, never knowing that she would later be caught in a love triangle with LING and JIT.

Ok well another one of my liking for folktales stories this drama is portrayed for.
I like Linda to act more of such dramas^_^.
I don`t like her modern dramas.
Well basically the story focuses more on how TSUI and JIT became evil because of love and revenge.
Actually i never expected that TSUI will fall for LING.
The last part of the show which i watched for Yu was supposed to marry JIT even though the person that she likes is LING.
She couldn`t do anything but to resign to her fate because LING owe JIT a debt.
It was when the corrupt officers wanted to inprison and kill LING but JIT saved him despite being a officer himself.
JIT got into trouble with one of the corrupt officers and was tortured in jail.
He also become evil afterwards.
I haven`t watched the whole show so i don`t know what will happens next.
But i heard a rumour that at the ending of the drama is YU(linda died and cannot be reincarnated and stayed in the human world as a spirit), LING lived alone and became old,died etc(I think he did become an officer at first but switched to become a writer), never heard anything about JIT but i guess he commited suicide or something(that is like what usually happen to good people who became bad?) and TSUI practiced and eventually became an immortal or something.
Well this seems to be a sad ending because ALL OF THEM WERE SEPERATED.
But in the beginning song of the video i saw a part where LING is writing,YU was beside him with a different hairstyle and TSUI(in fox form).
So i think YU maybe stayed with him as a spirit but he can see her(maybe due to having power since he once drank TSUI blood thus having some immortal abilities).
Even though this story seems like under the "fictional catergory" but i find it realistic in a sense on the message the story is trying to convey.
LING`s father wants him to become an good officer as to be of good service to mankind but then why did he quit being one in the end(i assume that he quitted due to the title of the drama "the ghost writer").
However, LING alone could change much of anything.
What i meant is in reality,as long as you have really tried hard and did your best,it is good enough.
Even up to today and now,there are still many "evil" people around despite the education about morals and principles being taught in school.
Why?
It all boils down to this 3 things,MONEY,LOVE and POWER.
These three shows the best and worst of humanity and it is what contributes to a "good" or "evil" person.
Well,i wouldn`t say that there is a purely "good" or "evil" person as everyone has their own good/bad characteristics.
What i mean is "people may change" for example: a "good" person may become "evil" while a "evil" person can become "good" as well.
Also,i heard from a show that in this world is about balance.
It uses this metaphor as an example "Fish cannot survive in pure water and neither can it survive in polluted water."
So it is this balance that makes the world unfair.
This drama also portrays the good and downside of mankind.
So yeah~I shall continue watching to understand this complicated yet twisted story.
This is the beginning song/video of the drama enjoy hehes :D.(Eh but blogger don`t allow me to post it :( damm.)

Oh today me and my twin wore the similiar checkered shirt and got into the same group LOL(She said that she counted 20 people wearing checkered shirt today.)

In order to be happy and contented,does it mean that i have to accept that there is no gurantee of happy ever after in every story?

Now i learnt that matters most are the memories whether it may be good or bad,it is part of my memory.

How can i?

Something i frequently ponder about.

But first i shall blog about what happen yesterday.

After school, went with huishan to pasar malam after eating and chatting at Mac.

First time i see someone laugh till cry sia!!!

Even though it`s not me that make her like this =x.

It is someone who eat burger with maiyonese stuck on his mouth and walking around without knowing it.

LOL ok then we went pasar malam to walk.

I bought two clothes and she bought one.

She bought one same shirt but different colour hahas ^_^!

It was a good day till i reached home and found out something.

First i was quite pissed off but i realised next time i have to be more careful of my surrondings next time.

Beware of rumours and people who likes to twist the facts.

Sometimes, it hurts me to see the path you are taking, good friend.

But as a friend, i respect your decision and will give you support.Yeah?

It`s a crisis.

What should i do and is there anything i can do?

I miss the days at Lagunita...

HEY HEY!!!
Aww do you know who this girl is?
She is my favourite character from the game "threads of fate"
I still remember the times i used to play this playstation game.
Love it.
LOL.
Her name is Mint and little Mint here hates pumpkins(me too LOL!)

Hmm today i am going to do a little post about me.
Because these few days i have been searching on the net about astrology.
Don`t know why i am so interested in it =\.
Maybe because i want to be able to understand people better.
Every person is different in their own way,sometimes so different i find it hard to understand.
We are all human but why are our personalities so different?
Have anybody ever wondered why?
My classmates seem to be engrossed too when i talk about it.
The astrology that i am talking about doesn`t mean your sun sign only.
It includes the full natal chart and the other planets that influence your personality.
Basically i learnt that just by looking at the sun sign won`t tell much.
It is too generalised and not very accurate LOL.

Ok about me...

1. I am weird.As in i like the weird things that usually people will not be interested about?Aliens,UFO,Magic,spirits,faries etc.Anything extraordinary.

2. I find people do not understand me.Well not surprising because i don`t understand myself much either.But i live with it.

3. I am quite erm democratic?I can accept other`s views/opinions/comments readily and i am not the type that will change other views.But hate it when people try to enforce theirs on me(EXTRMELY DISLIKE).

4. People say i am stubborn.Hmm...i guess i am a little.LOL usually the advice my friends gave me don`t go into my head.One ear in and one ear out.Especially when i am determined on doing something,nothing can change my mind.

5. I am unrealistic in terms of money.I see that around me everyone seem to be obsessed/worried and wanting to earn more money.My meaning of "unrealistic" may be i don`t really value money.Money isn`t the most important to me.Goals/dreams/purpose/ambition/having to find a meaning in life are.

6. I don`t have much likes or dislikes.I like to remain neutral.LOL.

7. Sense of freedom is quite high or what to not.Don`t like to be told what to do.Don`t like to be restricted either.

8. I think i am quite polite.Because i don`t like people who are rude.I practice good manners :D.

9.I am lazy and i don`t like that :(.

10. Growing up feeling different and very much isolated even though i may have many friends in the past.

11. Sometimes my friends call me a confident person.Actually not really.

12. Childish.Hahas used to.But i still collect stuffed toys but i won`t let anybody know =x.

13. I do have an ego/pride.

14. I am quite generous :D.But selfish too in some ways.I always share my food.

15. Moral values are important to me.Sense of justice is quite strong too.I cannot stand biasness or unfairness.

16. I love peace.But i have the tendancy to create chaos when provoked.Don`t try to mess with me >:(.

17. I like to be with people who share the same thoughts/values with me.I find it is easier to communicate with such people hahas.

18. Animals are my best friends.Innocent and pure like me =x.Jkjk.Humans are sometimes to complicated to my liking.I prefer being with animals.

19. Lastly, i like eating,sleeping ,exploring new and interesting things,learning(not studying),spicy/sweet stuffs,amusement parks,zoos,stuff toys,photography,music,stylish clothing and kungfu LOL.

Wouldn`t it be nice for me to go to Lotte world someday?
After watching "we are dating" of Xander and Minah.
Makes me want to make a dating list too of the fun things couples do when dating.
I want to try skiing LOL.
Go Lotte world.
Go to those places where you can see the stars using the stetoscope?I dunno how to spell LOL.
Go Marina bay sands the skypark!
So many many more LOL but it`s time for me to sleep.Good night y~all.I am going back to my castle now.My horsecart is waiting for me.My pony is getting impatient hahas.

I wish i am more smitten by you...

Oh this is the long due pic and the only poleroid picture i have of kevin woo my idol(nice right?).

Ok i am not obsessed with him ok?

Even though he have the ability to make many girls hearts flutter.

Who will not love him?

It is like the humblest,talented and polite idol i have seen.*aww feel like pinching your cheeks*

Ok so back to my story...

I drew a picture today....

Not yet enough to create a story though...

There is another picture i draw...but too ugly so didn`t post LOL.

But i guess my heart still belongs to you...So why didn`t it change?

Look at little monster inc sulley trying to act fierce LOL.

This picture is so nice...The colours...:).

When people from two different worlds meet.This pictures tells a lot.What can you infer from this picture?Hahas.:).

Hello everyone!

Let me share with you a story for today...

Hello everyone.

I am parakeet.

I have a dream or perhaps many dreams.

Dreams as in a goal.

Something that i want to fufill/achieve in life.

But hmm...as you can see...i am so small sometimes even insignificant...

Well for me, my dream is to become a pheonix and eat as many variety of seeds buffet as possible.Chirp ~ ^_^.

My hobby is singing and exploring new places.

During my journey,i met many friends such as mouse,kitty,pigrabbit,tortoise,wild boar etc etc as well as enemies.

Say hi to my good friend mouse.

I prefer calling it rat though hahaha ^_^.

We both love to eat seeds and spend much time together.

However my friend here is not very happy :(.

Maybe due to the dark times it had in the rubbish dump.

But this mouse here is a kindhearted soul, but sadly it met many unwanted company that causes it sometimes to be a unhappy mouse.

Mouse and i are kind of the same, in some way.

Parakeet and mouse met by coincidence on a green field along with the other animals.

Both came here for the seeds buffet LOL :D.

There is a legend that by eating the seeds buffet,it has the ability to help you fufill one wish.

It has also the ability of overcoming the impossible.

That is the reason why Parakeet came here from afar.
However, mouse had no wish and there is a side effect of eating seed buffet but having no results achieve.
Mouse was vexed but hoping it could find the answer by attending this buffet.

However, the buffet is only for those who knew what they want.

Well, Parakeet is not completely free of problems.

The outcome of this buffet is that it can only fufill only one wish.

But the problem with Parakeet is it doesn`t know which to choose among it`s many wishes.

One has no wish while the other has too many.

What to do?

~To be continued~

The soil which parakeet once thought would find some treasure(seeds) in it.

The woods that once made parakeet feel that it`s not alone.

And the merman???

NO WAY!!!!!!!!!

I think i lost the most important(meaningful) thing to me.
It is like my lucky aka happiness charm.
So now how is the prince going to find the princess?
I don`t remember bringing it out.
I don`t remember showing it to other people other than huishan.
And i will never give anybody at this point of moment.
So where are you?
Princess charm where are you?
Prince charm is npt complete without you.
So please come back :(.
I am going to turn my bedroom upside down tomorrow.
Going to annoy my maid to the extreme.
AISHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Going to get some beancurd from the frige now.
No more strawberries :(.
Hope there is some ice cream too.
Char ja yoh~

These i get from tumbler and some from vivian`s tumbler as well...

All that describes my life perfectly...

To a certain someone...Don`t make me say things i don`t want to say -.-"...That will lead me in saying some nasty stuffs...Hope you understand...Thinking about it just makes my blood boil (-_-)".

Yeah.Not easy i know :(.

Like in a neverending maze @_@.

Yes i do.

Dunno why i keep *cough cough cough* at night.

Seems like everybody is getting sick now.

Take care everyone.

OMG!!!U-kiss coming to sg again this June?WOW great.But i am going to be broke again.Shall save.I heard that they will be going to Malaysia too?WOW even more great :D.I am most most extremly happy that SG is like their first stop?Hahas :)).

Say HELLO to mr kiwi!!!

Thinking of New zealand just makes me so PISSED but i love mr kiwi LOL.(It is my bro`s actually and he is very protective of it.Don`t even let me touch so i have to do so secretly.)

Today was a so-so day.

Nothing special.

But there was this module talk,we wanted to go at first but decided not to because Jennifer said it was a waste of time.

The module will be preselected for us anymore.

Then meanwhile while the class either went for break of the talk,there were only four people in class.

Elaine,Jennifer,Huishan and i.

So we chatted.

It was a very long chat and it was such a coincidence that we have connections.

I cannot reveal what we said there as it may affect many people.

Elaine and i had pinky promise =).(i don`t think there is a need to blog out anyway)
So that is about it.

I guess i can officially say i am either silently resigned from LJS or they officially fired me.

So i am now currently jobless again T_T.

All because i was sick and i didn`t dare to tell them as i already skip one day of work already.

And my dad bought all GREEN PAINT to refurnish my house.

My house is going to look like some forest or alien planet now.

So DAMM green ok >.<. Do we really look like twins?(Taken a long time ago LOL)

This few days.

It really got me pondering.

Why no matter what i do.

I am just not given the same love that others have.

It`s not that i crave for it but sometimes you will feel kind of disappointed as you are better/done much more but the love and regconition you receive is much less.

For example,in the past,when i was still very young,my grades was always better than my brother`s.

But why the one who get canned often was me?

My brother never gotten canned in his whole entire life.(My dad don`t canned while well mum`s are biased toward little brothers).

And no matter how good my results were,my parents never praised me.

Well once i scored 99/100 for my maths.

Highest results that i ever gotten.

But all they ever notice is the one mark that i lost.

It is very demoralising and thinking about it just makes me pissed?Upset?Unfair?

Since young i feel neglected as a child already(can`t help it as i stayed with my relatives till i am 3).

The only thing i can say i am lucky to have are i have some very good friends i can count on.

I never well really been the affectionate type of person or neither will i express my love to them.
Because i realised i am a jinx to myself in relationships with people.

I am like a bomb to myself.

Any moment i can self-destruct and any moment i can lose everything that is important to me just by showing one word - affection.

Whenever i act nonchalent or heartless,people seem to come to me instead.

And whenever i started to care,this is the time they pack up and leave.

Weird huh?

That is why i feel that i am a jinx to myself.

But it`s painful bottling up this feelings.

I don`t want to but i have to.

Because i don`t want to lose things that are important to me.

There is a saying in chinese that says "being kind to others is equivalent to being cruel to yourself".

I think this phrase suits the jinx/curse that is born within me.

The moment i start showing humanity and compassion, that is when i lose myself, there is no best of both worlds.

The moment i start giving,is the moment i start losing every bit of myself maybe including my life perhaps.

I guess i can equate this to balance.

Well,in terms of relationship only whether it is with friends,family or whatever.

I feel that i am a jinx to myself in relationships.

Nothing ends well and i have to live with it.

I guess the only way to overcome this is to have no relationship at all, no connections.

As having no relationships/connections is less painful than putting your heart into something that you will lose it someday.

So the many important people in my life,promise that you won`t leave me?

Even if i say this,it won`t help.

I can`t control fate as i am born under the number of saturn.

The planet of fate that i have no control over.

I am not superstitious but this is what is actually happening to me time and again.

But at least i know the reason why now.

It has nothing to do with my actions,maybe this is just how my life is supposed to be,i don`t want to surrender to fate but how am i going to fight against what is already planned for me?

How is the little me going to make a difference to make my life a little better?

Please don`t walk away from my life will you?Friends,family and even you?

What you said today makes me wonder,you said the people close to you will always turn out unhappy.

I wonder if i have this effect too,that`s why they leave me one by one time and again.

Please don`t think that way because i know you are a nice person and those people leaving you is not your fault(well some people you met are really inconsiderate and selfish -.-").

I want you to know that at least i got a friend to keep me company now and that makes me happy :).

Helpless and confused.

Hope i don`t get nightmares.

Good night.

Going to go to my dreamland of weird dreams(Hopefully no dreams tonight eh).

Yeterday night i taking pictures of dream of cute mini horses,can someone interpret what it means?

Hahas lol :).

Tata shall blog again tomorrow \(^_^)/ - Hopefully i will stay like this hahas.

Happy 2011!!!

Ok it isn`t 4 hours before New Year but i love this pic so i have to post it.
And i am sure nobody have this pic as your new year`s blog post right?

So i assume it is original?^_^

Btw if you are wondering who this cute guy is...

He is my idol kevin woo from u-kiss!!!U U U U-kiss eh~Brave sound~Brave sound~>.<.

Well i posted his pic because he is really a wonderful + fantastic person.

I shall tell you why next time when i am free because i have too much to say opps =x.

He is like a role model to me.

From him i learnt a lot of things.

Why i find him amiable?

Because he never fails to make me laugh,his attitude towards life and kindness is what makes him admirable.

Perserverance,hardwork and determination is the key to success and no matter what failures you have faced that may upset you,you have to get back up as you don`t want to let yourself down right?

Aww...whatever it is how can you not love this sweet guy who never fails to make people laugh.

My role model fighting ok!!!

I have to admit i am envious of him because he is so talented!!!(he know how to dance,sing,play piano and guitar :( aww.)

Ok back to the main point...

Ok basically i will start with my new year`s resolution...

Hmm...

1)Work harder and study harder

2)Learn an musical instrument(Piano,guitar or drums) >=)

3)Be more healthy(Run everyday GOGOGO!)

4)Eat less

5)Be more thrifty and get more jobs to support my "going overseas" trips

6)Sing more(I bet no one knows i love singing.Only my family members know =x)

7)Learn a dance(I know i am not talented in dancing so knowing one will be good enough for me)

8)More time to keep my hamsters/guinea pig/toys company.I guess that is it for now.

I still have a long list though.

Till then.Tatata.LOL.

Even now i still miss you.

So everytime i ask myself "Do i still love you?"

There are somethings i just could not explain.

But everytime i console myself by saying.

If you love me too,you will come to find me so whatever i do now will be futile.

So the only thing i can do is to stay put on this spot.

Hoping you will return :).

Now off to watch "we are dating".

Off to check whether and see if there is any new episodes.

Good night all and sweet dreams ^_^ hahas.