in need

Today went to vivo city with Maisarah and Khairunnisa.
Seemed like this was the first time i went shopping with my classmates =D.
We went to walk around and i saw a windmil that was very special.
Maisarah and Khairunnisa saw it too.
Felt like buying it but i know that my Mum would not like it due to some superstitious stuff so i decided not to buy hahas.
Once again i went crazy over the cute toys at "Xin Tian Di".
I was so happy when i went into the shop and saw the tv playing DBSK VIDEOS!!!
I did not notice it at first but when i saw Jaejoong i immediately went crazy because i know that soon i am going to see Changmin`s face on the video as well =D.
I felt that it was such a coincidence.
I never saw or heard about DBSK untill Weiming showed me the mirotic video on youtube.
Once i know about DBSK,and today seemed to be the first time i went shopping after i knew about DBSK existence and i saw their video in the shop!!!
Maybe they might come to singapore for a concert soon(I HOPE SO!!!).
When i was in the shop,i could not help but kept staring at the screen.
And it seemed like those people working in the shop spotted me!!!
They were like giving me strange glances and made me feel so pai seh =.=.

After that we went to Long John.
I watched khairunnisa eat and she was so cute when she eats.
I like watching people eat =x.
Ok i know i sound sick to like watching people eat.
Thats what my friends used to say =x.
I hope khairunnisa wont feel awkward XD.
It was nice of her to offer us her fries.
Thanks khairunnisa!

After eating we went to Candy Empire.
I used to buy a lot of things there.
Cannot resists the chocolates there but i know the economy is bad and everything so i stopped myself from buying all the stuffs that i wanted to buy.
After Khairunnisa and Maisarah went home,i continued to roam around vivo city.
My friend could not make it to accompany me so i shopped alone.
As i walked,i thought about him again.
I do not know why,maybe its been such a long time since i last saw him.
I thought all the schoolwork and new environment had made me forget about him.
Why is it that whenever i am alone,i think of him among everyone else?
I guess absence really make the heart grows fonder.
I watched a movie starring DBSK yesterday and there was this part about Yunho.
His company made him go for a vacation.
There was this fangirl who wrote a letter to Yunho saying that she is dying and if her letters stopped coming,it means that she is dead.
There was this day when her letters stopped coming and Yunho thought that she was dead and went to pay his respects to her.
When yunho reached the destination,she was still alive though but she actually had an illness and she lied to Yunho so that she can at least see him once before she died.
They spent some days together and there was this day before she died she says "when i die,i want to become a star that shines on the person i love" and "being able to see Yunho,i could die happy now".
The next day was the day she died.
I thought about what that girl had said and felt the same way.
If only i could also spend one day with him,just one day.

On the way to "xin tian di" again,i was deep in thought until this guy beside me said some weird stuffs.
He was talking to his friends and suddenly turned to me and showed me a handsign.
He asked me if i knew what it was(I was already shocked by the way he talked to his friends and i tried to keep a low profile so that he would not notice me but ARGHH!!!) and i shooked my head.
I couldnt catch what he said and when i reflect on what the handsign looked like,it looked like some kind of vulgar language from a foreign country =.=.
I just couldnt resists seeing DBSK and the cute stuffed toys that is why i head to "xin tian di" over and over again XD.
Was looking for their album but couldnt find it,wonder why the shop played DBSK on tv when they were not advertising their product.
Wanted to buy the stuffed toys too but i stopped myself XD.
They were hard to resist.
I was staring at the screen again when i saw that GUY again!!!
He went the other direction just now and i wondered when he came into the shop.
He smiled at me so being polite i smiled back to him.
Maybe unknowingly vivian is spreading her attracting "weirdos" energy to me that is why i met this weirdo today.
Vivian please spread your energy to marcus instead LOL.
Im sure he loves weirdos =D.
I quickly leave the shop after i saw that guy.
Went to the arcade and see nothing interesting except the catching machine but i stopped myself from playing as it is a waste of money.

Went to the pet shop and the cute hamsters never failed to cheer me up.
I wanted one since i was like p3 as many of my friends had them.
However,my mum always refused to let me buy them.
Although now she is more open minded in letting me keep them as im older.
But now i am afraid to keep them due to the maggot phobia.
I am afraid that it would attract maggots into my room.
Imagine them crawling around just make me feel disgusted.
I have to make a choice XD.
But having a pet will make me feel very happy and keeps me occupied.
I love animals a lot.
If i have one at least i have something to keep me company everyday,something to talk to and something to listen to my sorrows.

I know it is impossible between us.
But i could not get myself to forget you.
Tell me what i should do.
I am confused.
Tired.
And lonely.

Must be thinking why i am awake at such a late time right?
Maybe its because my holidays are going to end T.T.
While my friends are just starting,why must rp be so cruel!!!
Played npc with carrotgal just now,won a lot of dens ^_^.
And she is still playing at such a time.
FURTHERMORE,I STILL CANNOT ACCEPT THE FACT THAT LAOER MAKE ME HIS WAITER IN RESTAURANT CITY!!!
HOW COULD YOU!!!
I DEMAND YOU TO SACK ME RIGHT AWAY!!!
ARGHH AND U STILL CHOOSE AN AH MA CHARACTER FOR ME!!!
LOL and i am still listening to 5566 songs at such a time XD.
*Yawns* i think i should go to sleep soon.
Although i am tired but i cant get to sleep.
I will just end up rolling in bed and thinking of many things,my future,my life and that person XD.
I wish i could let go.
But somehow i am still lingering on the memories XD.
It is impossible as our distances are just too far apart.
There are two choices i have to make.
One is the courage to go forward.
Another is wait for the chance a.k.a the coincedence that i will meet him again.
HAIX it is like waiting for money to fall from the sky!!!
AND I DUN HAVE ENOUGH COURAGE!!!
But things are better now as i am psychoing myself to get over him.
I would like to also thank my friends for their support,i am just not brave enough and chooses to escape from the fact that i like him and want to know more about him =x.
I am going to keep my heart locked up from now.
You will be left as an important memory.
I guess you will be something i will never be able to get hold of.
Feels like i have no courage left within me.
Seems like there is a part of me that fears rejection.
I do not want you to avoid me or find me annoying.
Till the day i regain my courage,which will make me stronger.
And that is when i will bravely face you,along with these feelings kept deep within my heart.
Wish that i am the hands molding you.
I am there to know what happens around you.
Watching over you.
I really hope that one day you will notice my existence XD.

Hey hey~
It`s been a really very long time since i blog.
Met the hei family yesterday(11/6/09),a memorable day and it is also the day of the truth.
Well,i was reluctant to tell at first but i think i should be honest to myself and of course all the dearest hei family members.
My darkest secrets are out T.T,guess i have no more secrets to keep anymore.
Actually i find it quite painful to keep things in your heart and lying to myself or others.
So li ling is going to be an honest girl and i did it!
I hope these are the only people who know this secret and help me protect it ya~(cause i dun want anyone else to know liao >.<).
Went to eat sakae sushi,we ended up chatting more than eating.
It had really been a long time since we chatted.
Today went to play badminton with Marcus,Wenhui,Gabriel and Wei ying.
So sad that Germaine did not come T.T.
Marcus keep bullying his poor ah gong!!!
How could you!!!
I make sure one day i am going to smash the ball hard on your face!!!=x
Since it looked like its going to rain and there are some droplets of rain falling down,we went to play heart attack under Wenhui`s void deck.
And thanks Wenhui for the soya bean milk!!!
Dunno why Gabriel kept winning,and both marcus and gabriel hand were the most red =D.
Marcus is like a violent person who doesnt show any mercy when he won,our poor hands got tortured T.T.
While Wenhui is so enthusiatic when playing the game,when i am so stressed out trying to win and get a chance so that i can get revenge on the violent marcus!!!.
But i keep ending up hitting the table!!!
ARGHH!!!
After that we played uno and went home.
So sad that neither Gabriel or Marcus gets to forfeit.
Well there is always a next time >=).
Oh Marcus is having his DB swimming test soon,any hei family member interested in seeing him drown or swim like a ducky can inform gabriel.
He is going to be TP`s tourguide!Hahas!
Ok i guess that`s it for today.
Dunno when i will ever blog again.
Till then XD.

Us!!!Not the full picture of hei family though.

Sport`s day 2008!

Ok nerdy me doing nerdy pose XD.

Graduation High Tea

The girls =D.