in need

Hey if you happen to be reading this.
If you happen to find this familiar and it happened in your life before...
Yes it`s you.
I am referring to you.
Hey mr,
I have many things to tell you.
I wouldn`t know if you will be reading this or would you even care but...
All i want to tell you is that i have really fallen for you.
All along i had this feelings kept inside me.
I wonder when it all begun.
I remember i used to look forward to biology class every friday because of you.
My friends find it strange why i like you because you are not really "my type" of guy.
However,after asking myself WHY WHY WHY countless times.
I finally understood.
What i like about you is your kindness,your patience and you are always helpful to those around you.
What is most important is...
You make me very happy when i see you.
I remember that time when your friend was stuck in the rain and couldn`t come back to class and you went down with his umbrella to fetch him.
Nobody volunteered to fetch him except you.[Even though he has lots of good friends in the class(yeah right i suspect things changed a lot now.)]
I still remembering asking you where you are going as presentation is going to start and you won`t make it back on time.
But you still went eventually.
You did not know but this little action of yours really touched me.
Seriously,i have never met a guy like you before NEVER.(It`s not that my guy friends are bad, but they have SOME flaws that i seriously cannot stand.Ok i shall not elaborate.)
However,this action of yours really bothered me.
Sometimes i wonder why you are still so nice to him even though its freaking obvious that he is CRAZY for you.
To be honest,at that time i thought you were gay.
Somehow,i couldn`t get why he was so hostile towards me.
Maybe he knows that i like you?(Strange but at that time my feelings weren`t that confirmed yet.)
I tried to get along with him but i can sense his sacasticness.
After awhile,i sense the class starting to get "not as nice" to me.
But it is not everybody,only those close to him.
Then one fine day he came and talk to me on msn.
Asking me about "whether i`m single","anybody i like" and eventually "leading to you".
Cannot believe that i still have that copy in my laptop.
I still remember that day when i gathered all of my friends to unreveal the "hidden message" within the conversation.
It was hillarious.
And the next day was the most embarrasing moment of my life.
I just step into the badminton court and found these few people giggling.
Have you ever imagined how i feel?(Yes totally embarassed because i was looking at you.)
And then you waved at me suddenly.
The giggling got louder and at that time i really don`t know how to react.
As i was afraid,very afraid that they might find out that i liked you.
That is why i had the natural sudden change of behaviour such as acted cold and being nonchalent.
I was afraid that if they found out,they will isolate you from me.
If you have noticed but i guess you wouldn`t,i am friendly to you when your friends aren`t around and i will automatically come talk to you but when they are around it is a different story.
And then friend D asked me to come over to your team(You would not know how happy i am back then),but i have to hide it.
I remembered myself saying "i don`t want to play with you" because i was fed up with myself as i couldn`t catch your ball.
But you did not leave.
I really regret saying that as i don`t mean it.(ARGHH HOW DUMB CAN I GET!)
I am sorry if i hurt your feelings.
I think i am just nervous and dunno why these words come out of my mouth.
I remember telling this to huishan and she said "Oh,you like that ah i can understand.But then other people will think you like him because of your huge reaction while he will think you really dislike him".
Is this what people call reverse psychology?
After you went off i was like upset the whole day.
Why am i saying all these?
Maybe because i think you don`t believe that i like you?
Maybe i would like to know how you actually feel?
Maybe i just want to get my feelings across?
Well all i know is i feel much better after saying out how i actually feel.